Finally Satisfied Page 5

  With renewed determination, she smiled and said, “Lead the way.”

  She was relieved when he bypassed the aisles filled with baby items. She’d known from the time she was six months pregnant that she had to give her baby up, so she’d made a point of never, ever allowing herself to shop for baby items, or even be caught in the baby aisle. Not hard at all when she did all her shopping online. And if a friend had a baby and a gift was needed, she’d found gift cards were the easiest way to avoid thinking about it for long.

  “I know Eric has two kids, but what about your sisters?” She needed to keep him focused and on task. She didn’t know how long her bravery would last.

  “Susannah has three girls, Erin has a girl and a boy, and Jessica doesn’t have any yet. Their ages range between five and twelve years old.” He turned down an aisle filled with bright pink boxes. “Barbie stuff is a safe bet for the two younger girls . The twelve year old, Beth, has outgrown them. She’ll be the hardest to buy for.”

  “Not necessarily. Clothes always work for that age. Have you checked their wish lists?”

  He stopped and looked at her. “What wish list? You mean, like, letters to Santa? “

  Angel laughed. “You don’t spend much time online, do you?”

  “Other than work-related stuff, no.”

  “Most people these days have wish lists on Amazon. We should check their lists to see what they want.” She pulled out her phone, punched a few keys, then asked, “Okay, their lists are probably embedded under their mothers’ names, so what are those?”

  He gave her the info and in another minute she handed him the phone. “Looks like Susannah’s girls still like Barbie, so let’s get those first.” She turned to the shelves and scanned the multitude of choices. “How much do you want to spend?”

  Once they’d filled the cart with pink boxes, they moved to the video game section for the oldest girl. Mitch looked uncertain. “Are you sure this is what she wants?”

  “Look at her list. The games are all listed as high priority, the other stuff is marked low, so I suspect those were her mother’s idea.”

  It only took a minute to pick out a couple of games for Beth. Mitch checked for a wish list for Eric’s kids as well and sure enough, they both had one. Which made the rest of the shopping a breeze. With the addition of a bicycle for Erin’s boy, they were finished way before he was ready. He’d figured the shopping would take several hours. It always did when he went by himself.

  Though Angel seemed anxious to get out of the store, she didn’t seem anxious to go home, so he suggested they go to his house, where she could help him wrap the gifts and he could ply her with hot chocolate. To his surprise, she agreed.

  She’d made a lot more progress than he’d realized.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Angel was more impressed than she wanted to be. Mitch had grown up with several siblings in a small frame house in a working class neighborhood, so she’d expected him to go for a big, flashy house up in the hills now that he was a doctor. Instead, he’d chosen a log house on several acres east of the city. The rugged home surrounded by trees suited him. Private, reserved, peaceful.

  It was situated at the end of a long driveway, out of view of the road. Accent lights on the trees illuminated the drive with soft beams, and more lined the walk leading to the house. He hadn’t gone overboard with Christmas decorations, but had just enough to pay tribute to the holidays.

  He turned on the lights as they stepped inside, showing a large, open floor plan with an impressive stairway on one side. She immediately imagined a bride descending that stairway as the guests below watched and cameras snapped.

  “Let me show you around, then I’ll go get the presents out of the car.”

  Mitch’s voice snapped her out of her daydream. What a fool she was. She would neither be that bride, nor would she be the photographer who captured the moment. “Sure,” she said, following Mitch into the large kitchen. Black granite countertops and stainless steel appliances were softened by area lighting and a large Indian rug.

  He opened the fridge and pulled out two beers and offered her one. She shook her head. “Medications.”

  He nodded and put the bottle back in the fridge. “We’ll do the hot chocolate, then. Come on, I’ll show you the media room.”

  Where the rest of the house had log walls and rustic furniture, the media room was as modern as any high-tech theater. Acoustical tiles covered the walls and ceiling, the floor was made of cork, the furnishings covered in butter-soft leather. Theater seating would hold twelve people, and each seat had its own drink holder. When he hit a button on the wall, a curtain at the far end of the room slid back to reveal a wall-sized screen.

  “Wow. This is pretty impressive.” She sat in one of the seats and leaned it back, looking up at the screen. “I may never be content to watch movies at the mall again.”

  “That was my main motivation for this room. A couple of times taking the girls to the movies and I swore never again. Now they come here to watch new releases and old favorites, and I don’t have to worry about them catching some terrible skin infection.”

  “I’ll bet you have a pretty impressive movie collection.”

  He shook his head. “Not really. I use a subscription service most of the time. I don’t like a lot of clutter.”

  He turned off the light and continued down the hallway, where he opened the door to the master bedroom. “The rest of the bedrooms are upstairs. They mostly go unused unless the girls spend the night.”

  Angel stepped inside. The room seemed to wrap itself around her like a warm, fuzzy blanket and drew her in. The peace and tranquility of the room was almost palpable. There was no television, no computer--no electronics at all as far as she could see. Blackout curtains over the windows blocked all outside light. Small, muted lights highlighted various areas of the room--the bed, the dressing area, a reading chair.

  Mitch crossed the room and drew back the curtains. He opened the French doors and stepped out onto a balcony. The back of the house was several feet above the ground as the land fell away toward a creek. A short stairway at one end led down to the patio.

  “This is where I spend most of my time when the weather cooperates,” he said. “All of the stress seems to melt away out here under the stars.”

  She joined him and looked up. Without the city lights, stars exploded across the sky. “I never knew there were so many.”

  “You never get out of town to see the stars?”

  “No. I spend most of my time at home, at my computer. Other than photo shoots and weddings, I never go anywhere.” And for the first time, she realized what she’d been missing. Regretted letting her life get so rigid and isolated. She’d missed out on so much.

  “You’ll love the mountains, then. The stars feel close enough to reach up and touch.”

  She looked out over the backyard, where the stone patio seemed to merge directly into a swimming pool. Lights in the pool made the water look so inviting, even though she knew it would be cold. “The pool is beautiful. I love to swim. It’s one of the things I miss the most about growing up.”

  “It’s heated. Want to go for a swim?”

  She did. But not tonight. She shook her head, wishing she had the courage to say yes instead. But she’d taken some huge steps tonight and she wasn’t ready for another. “Not this time. But ask me again sometime, please?”

  He put an arm around her shoulder, oh so casually. His body heat warmed the chill she hadn’t even noticed. Angel turned to look up at him. His head was closer than she’d expected and his lips were barely an inch away. He had a firm, masculine mouth. No pouty lips or thin, mean ones here. She licked her lips and felt Mitch go very still.

  “Angel,” he whispered as he closed the distance and their lips met.

  She knew it was wrong. She should push him away. He was Eric’s brother, a Turner. He would turn against her just like his parents and brother had.

  But when he teased her lips ope
n with his tongue and deepened the kiss, gathering her close to his warm body, all thoughts of his family faded away and he was simply Mitch. The one person who had always been there for her--or would have been if she’d let him. The one who’d offered her a way to keep her baby, even though he would have lost his chance at college, at the big scholarship.

  She slid her arms around his neck, bringing their bodies into full contact. She could feel how much he wanted her. If he touched her, down there, he would know just how much she wanted him back. But he didn’t. He kissed her senseless, then simply held her, her head on his shoulder, until the cool night air brought them both back to their senses.

  “I’m sorry,” he said as he guided her back into the house. “I didn’t mean to do that.”

  “I’m not,” she whispered. But he didn’t hear her. He was too busy trying to fill the awkwardness with words as he walked her back out into the hallway, away from the temptation of the four poster bed with the navy blue comforter, away from the seduction of the moon and stars.

  She wished he’d stop. Stop talking. Stop pulling away. Stop trying to fix every damned thing.

  ***

  “Merry Christmas, dear.” Angel’s mother was in full Christmas morning mode. She’d started laying out the brunch buffet and the family-sized table was covered from corner to corner with everything from donuts to shrimp cocktail.

  “Merry Christmas, Mom. What’s all this? You have enough food here to feed a dozen people”

  “Just a half-dozen. Whatever we don’t eat this morning we can snack on this afternoon.”

  Angel stopped and turned to look at her mother, who was frying sausage links on the stove. “A half-dozen, Mom? There’s you, me, and Cara, right? That’s three. Oh, and I guess Cara’s bringing Gray, so that’s four.”

  “Yes, and Reggie and Sam are coming by. He gave his staff the day off.”

  “And you didn’t think to tell me about this? I don’t have gifts for Reggie and Sam.” She’d barely had enough money for presents for her mother and sister. And Mitch. His present was hidden in her closet and she still wasn’t sure she had the nerve to give it to him. Which reminded her… “Is anyone else coming?”

  Mitch had said he spent Christmas Day with Gray. So if Gray was coming here, that meant…

  “I believe Gray’s cousin might be coming with them.”

  “Mo-om! Why didn’t you tell me? Oh my god, I look like a mess.” She turned and ran up the stairs and hit the shower. Christmas morning had always been a lazy occasion. No one dressed up. Hell, most of the time they didn’t even get out of their pajamas before noon. But this year her mother had changed everything and hadn’t even thought to tell her.

  Angel stood under the pounding water and washed her hair. It took her a few moments to realize that even with such a huge change, no panic attack symptoms had appeared. No racing heart beat. No hyperventilating. No chest pains. Not even the idea of spending her normally quiet, peaceful Christmas with Mitch had sent her running to hide. No, she’d run to fix herself up instead.

  A smile spread across her face. Mitch was coming for Christmas! And she was actually happy about it.

  Her smile faded. Was her son having Christmas with his family? Could they afford gifts? What was he into now? Did he have his driver’s license? Would they give him a car for Christmas? She could never compete with that.

  You don’t have to compete, remember? He doesn’t even know you exist.

  She thought about what she and Vanessa had talked about last week. It was okay if her son didn’t know about her. All that mattered was that he was safe, happy, healthy. Vanessa had guided her through the steps of registering with several sites that reunited adopted kids with their biological parents. If he was looking for her, he’d be able to find her now. All she had to do was wait. And pray.

  She took special care with her makeup, dried her hair and pulled it back into a ponytail, then wasted precious time going through outfit after outfit before she finally decided on leggings, a long sweater, and boots. Casual without being sloppy, but also without looking like she’d given a lot of thought to her clothing choice.

  She took Mitch’s gift from the closet, added some ribbon and a bow to the plain red paper, and found a gift tag to attach to the front. Then she sat down at her computer to see what she could do for Reggie and Sam. She’d had an idea a few days ago, then forgot it in all the hustle and bustle leading up to the holiday. She’d thought she’d have a couple of days to work on it after Christmas. Well, it wouldn’t be perfect, but she thought they’d like it.

  She finished wrapping it as the doorbell rang.

  ***

  Mitch stood a few feet behind the others, wondering what he was doing there. He hadn’t seen Angel since the night he’d kissed her. Though she’d stayed long enough to help him with the wrapping and to drink a cup of hot chocolate, he could tell he’d pushed her too far, too fast. She was itching to go from the moment they’d left his bedroom.

  Since then he’d stayed away, busy at work with sick kids and older adults thanks to a fast-moving flu. His arms were full of gifts for everyone, Angel included, but his real gift to her was still in his car. It wasn’t something he wanted to spring on her in front of an audience.

  Mrs. Kensington opened the door, a big smile on her face. “Come on in out of the cold. Mitch, it’s good to see you. How is your family?”

  He murmured a response and slipped past her into the house before she could question him more closely. He looked around the living room. A fire burned brightly in the fireplace, a large tree twinkled in the corner. The dining room table looked ready to collapse under the weight of food and candy. But Angel wasn’t there.

  He shouldn’t have come. He never would have agreed to come with Gray and Cara if not for the chance to see Angel. Where was she?

  A door closed upstairs and he looked up. Angel appeared at the top of the stairs and his heart skipped a beat. She looked beautiful in a bright red sweater and skinny black pants. He moved to the foot of the stairs as she took the first step. Her boot slipped on the carpet and she flailed her arms in the air for a moment, nearly dropping her packages, before she grabbed the rail and caught her balance. By that time he was halfway up the staircase.

  “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah, just feeling a bit foolish. Thanks for coming to my rescue.”

  He lifted a hand to her cheek. “You seem to be doing a pretty good job of rescuing yourself.”

  A blush spread across her cheeks and she ducked her head. “We’d better join the others.”

  She held the rail with one hand and he kept a hand under her elbow just in case she slipped again, but they made it to the bottom without further mishap.

  “Thanks,” she said. “I just need to put these under the tree and then we can eat.”

  Once she arranged them to her satisfaction, they went into the dining room where Gray and Sam had already piled their plates high with an impossible amount of carbs and calories. He caught Gray’s eye and lifted an eyebrow while staring pointedly at the plate.

  “Not a word, cuz. It’s Christmas.”

  “Your cholesterol doesn’t know that.”

  Cara stepped up beside Gray. “Is there something I should know about your cholesterol levels?”

  He glared at Mitch. “Not really. It’s a little high. No big deal.”

  Cara reached over and removed two cinnamon rolls from his plate and put them back on the table. “Yes, it is a big deal. Now that I know, I can make sure you eat better.”

  She led Gray toward the living room and he leaned close to Mitch as he passed by. “Traitor,” he whispered.

  Angel laughed. “I almost feel sorry for him. Cara can be overwhelming when she goes into mother mode.”

  By the time they’d finished their food and passed out gifts, Mitch had relaxed and felt almost like part of the family. Cara’s mother was his favorite kind of hostess--one who sat and enjoyed her company and didn’t mind if they got their own
refills or drinks. She didn’t feel like she had to “perform” like his own mother did. He’d much rather enjoy her company than have her wait on him.

  Which made him very unlike his father.

  Angel waited until everyone else had passed out their gifts before bringing hers out from under the tree. She quietly put them next to each recipient before returning to sit next to Mitch. “This is for you. It isn’t much, but…”

  Mitch pulled the ribbon and bows off and set them aside. Then he tore off the paper. In his hands he held probably the best portrait he’d ever seen of himself. “When did you do this?”

  “On the ship. I was watching you and you looked so distinguished in your suit and tie that I could resist snapping your picture. I thought maybe you could hang it in your waiting room or something. If you like it, that is.”

  He set the picture aside and kissed her cheek, aware that the others were watching them. “I love it. Thank you. Now, I have something for you, but this is just part of it. Your main gift is in the car, but I want to give it to you when we’re alone.”

  She took the small box and carefully unwrapped it. It was a jewelry box. Her mouth went dry before she realized it was too big for a ring. She carefully opened the box. Inside was a birthstone necklace.

  Tears welled in her eyes and ran down her cheeks. She fumbled trying to get it out of the box, so Mitch took it from her and placed it around her neck. She laid her hand over the birthstone, holding it against her chest.

  “I can’t tell you how much this means to me.”

  “I realized how important his birthday was to you when we were on the ship. No one who hasn’t been in your shoes realizes how difficult those birthdays must be.”

  She nodded. “I have a present in my closet for every single one, and a letter to go with them.”

  “Can I ask you a question? What did you name him?”

  She might not have answered him if he’d asked the question a few weeks earlier. But now, she wanted him to know. “Ryan Mitchell Kensington.”